“Support, NOT perfection” has been one of the blueprints of our work for years. Created and led by our Head of programs, Smiljana Grujic, it has so far helped more than 2,200 parents across Serbia. In recent years, in accordance with the epidemiological situation, we had to organize the workshops online, and Smiljana was joined on several occasions by our co-founder and global CEO, Jelena Djokovic, who shared her parenting experience and the challenges she faces on a daily basis.

With the support of our long-term partners, Generali Osiguranje Srbija and The Human Safety Net, last year we started the project of building 15 Parent Centers throughout Serbia, which will be a gathering place for parents and guardians in the next cycle of workshops. As we look forward to this project coming to life in all its splendor, we share with you the experiences of several parents who attended the recently completed workshops. We look forward to the new contingent of workshop participants who will have the opportunity to socialize and share experiences in a cozy environment.

Here is what the satisfied mothers said after the workshops, as they continue their parenting journey enriched with new knowledge and friendships:

“What was new to me and what I started to apply was the technique of short-term goals and everything related to emotional intelligence. To talk more with the children about emotions, to name and recognize them and to deal better with negative emotions. “- Katarina Milenković

Katarina Milenković says she could not be happier with the techniques she learned during the “Support, NOT perfection” workshops.

“A recommendation from the bottom of my heart, Smiljana will give you a concrete answer to everything that bothers you – not something vahue, but a real and concrete answer!” I would attend over and over again! “- Sanja Vukčević Vasić

Sanja Vukčević Vasić with her husband and son.

“I had regularly followed all NDF activities and participated in webinars, which motivated me to apply for the workshops. I wanted to find out the tips for parenting and raising children, and to share experiences with other parents. Now I am much more calm and I realized that the problems I face are not only mine but of other parents as well.
The most important practical examples that I adopted at the workshops were how to handle the rivalry between the big brother and his baby sister. “- Biljana Kostadinović

“All the information was useful to me, I enjoyed the company of mentors, and the way they approach all parents. I bought a book that Jelena recommended and it’s safe to say that I’m thrilled. Emotions and their regulation, love, tenderness, methods, healthy boundaries, self-messages””they can all really change the relationship between adults and children.
With a great dose of love and dedication, the whole team was at our disposal. They ensure that, after the program’s completion, a parent will know how to connect with the child and his needs, how to integrate true life values and thus support the child who will make confident and motivated steps towards a bright and beautiful future.”- Branka Mihailović (family from the cover photo)

A happy Radmilović family: mother Danka with her husband, daughter and son.

I learned a lot about myself, became aware of my own childhood and realized how I should not behave with my child. I tried to alter all the situations that reminded me of my mother’s behavior and how I felt in those moments. My family life has become richer in terms of conscious presence. “- Žaklina Andrejić

“I had read a lot about child psychology, but the way the program was designed in combination with Smiljana’s energy and her way of presenting completely enchanted me, so – here I am – finished my second cycle already!” – Danka Radmilović

The Novak Djokovic Foundation thanks all the participants of the workshops. We hope we have made your parenting journey easier and more meaningful. With that in mid, we are looking forward to a new cycle!

The post “Support, NOT Perfection” – Parents’ Workshop Impressions appeared first on Novak Djokovic Foundation.

“Support, NOT perfection” has been one of the blueprints of our work for years. Created and led by our Head of programs, Smiljana Grujic, it has so far helped more than 2,200 parents across Serbia. In recent years, in accordance with the epidemiological situation, we had to organize the workshops online, and Smiljana was joined on several occasions by our co-founder and global CEO, Jelena Djokovic, who shared her parenting experience and the challenges she faces on a daily basis.

With the support of our long-term partners, Generali Osiguranje Srbija and The Human Safety Net, last year we started the project of building 15 Parent Centers throughout Serbia, which will be a gathering place for parents and guardians in the next cycle of workshops. As we look forward to this project coming to life in all its splendor, we share with you the experiences of several parents who attended the recently completed workshops. We look forward to the new contingent of workshop participants who will have the opportunity to socialize and share experiences in a cozy environment.

Here is what the satisfied mothers said after the workshops, as they continue their parenting journey enriched with new knowledge and friendships:

“What was new to me and what I started to apply was the technique of short-term goals and everything related to emotional intelligence. To talk more with the children about emotions, to name and recognize them and to deal better with negative emotions. “- Katarina Milenković

Katarina Milenković says she could not be happier with the techniques she learned during the “Support, NOT perfection” workshops.

“A recommendation from the bottom of my heart, Smiljana will give you a concrete answer to everything that bothers you – not something vahue, but a real and concrete answer!” I would attend over and over again! “- Sanja Vukčević Vasić

Sanja Vukčević Vasić with her husband and son.

“I had regularly followed all NDF activities and participated in webinars, which motivated me to apply for the workshops. I wanted to find out the tips for parenting and raising children, and to share experiences with other parents. Now I am much more calm and I realized that the problems I face are not only mine but of other parents as well.
The most important practical examples that I adopted at the workshops were how to handle the rivalry between the big brother and his baby sister. “- Biljana Kostadinović

“All the information was useful to me, I enjoyed the company of mentors, and the way they approach all parents. I bought a book that Jelena recommended and it’s safe to say that I’m thrilled. Emotions and their regulation, love, tenderness, methods, healthy boundaries, self-messages””they can all really change the relationship between adults and children.
With a great dose of love and dedication, the whole team was at our disposal. They ensure that, after the program’s completion, a parent will know how to connect with the child and his needs, how to integrate true life values and thus support the child who will make confident and motivated steps towards a bright and beautiful future.”- Branka Mihailović (family from the cover photo)

A happy Radmilović family: mother Danka with her husband, daughter and son.

I learned a lot about myself, became aware of my own childhood and realized how I should not behave with my child. I tried to alter all the situations that reminded me of my mother’s behavior and how I felt in those moments. My family life has become richer in terms of conscious presence. “- Žaklina Andrejić

“I had read a lot about child psychology, but the way the program was designed in combination with Smiljana’s energy and her way of presenting completely enchanted me, so – here I am – finished my second cycle already!” – Danka Radmilović

The Novak Djokovic Foundation thanks all the participants of the workshops. We hope we have made your parenting journey easier and more meaningful. With that in mid, we are looking forward to a new cycle!

The post “Support, NOT Perfection” – Parents’ Workshop Impressions appeared first on Novak Djokovic Foundation.

September 25, 2016. The day that changed everything: Our Iris saw the light of day. Full of hope, expectations, anxiety… we embarked on an adventure that was new to all of us – parenthood. From the first day, Iris became the center of our world, the center of our lives. Time flew by unbelievably quickly, and there came the time for mom to start a new job, and for Iris to go to kindergarten. After only a few months, Mom changed her job again, Iris was going to kindergarten, and I first traveled to Novi Sad every day for work, and then to Belgrade.

The biggest change in our lives, other than our child, was when Mom started working in shifts. Fortunately, I started working in Kovacica shortly after that. Ahead of us was a great challenge, to balance all obligations regarding work, the house, an additional business we did as a family, and of course, the child. Due to the lifestyle dictated by the 21st century, we had less and less time for what was the most important to us – Iris. Because of that, and because of all other obligations, there was stress, tension, dissatisfaction… We believed that we were good parents, but it felt like something was missing.

And then something was discovered by my other half when she asked me if I saw the announcement for the “Support, NOT Perfection” workshop on the website of our child’s kindergarten.   The plan was for both of us to attend the seminar, but because of her job, that was impossible, so the decision was easy – Daddy will go!

In the beginning, I had a strange feeling, because I was the only dad in the group, along with moms and couples. It was even stranger to talk about something so intimate as parenting, with strangers I didn’t know.

I admit I overcame that feeling very quickly! It was an unbelievable feeling to come to workshops, I couldn’t wait for the next one, the group was great, and the facilitator was the best. The topic of the seminars was very familiar to all of us and often painful. We would go through topics that interest all parents, received guidance, and advice from other participants. Mom could hardly wait for me to come home, tell her everything, to do homework together. We bonded better and stronger, learned a lot together, and applied a lot in practice.

Kovacica is the first town in Serbia who got its Parenting Center on September 30, 2021. The workshops will take place there once the epidemiological situation grants it.

The program has a healing property on the parents’ psyche because you learn that we are all troubled by the same problems and that there are no perfect parents, and that should not be our goal either.

The main objective should be to be good people, to be a better person in the evening than the one who woke up that morning.

The Novak Djokovic Foundation gave my family and me the opportunity to do just that!

The post “Daddy will go…” – Personal Story of Ivan Barca, Participant of our “Support, NOT perfection” Workshops appeared first on Novak Djokovic Foundation.

September 25, 2016. The day that changed everything: Our Iris saw the light of day. Full of hope, expectations, anxiety… we embarked on an adventure that was new to all of us – parenthood. From the first day, Iris became the center of our world, the center of our lives. Time flew by unbelievably quickly, and there came the time for mom to start a new job, and for Iris to go to kindergarten. After only a few months, Mom changed her job again, Iris was going to kindergarten, and I first traveled to Novi Sad every day for work, and then to Belgrade.

The biggest change in our lives, other than our child, was when Mom started working in shifts. Fortunately, I started working in Kovacica shortly after that. Ahead of us was a great challenge, to balance all obligations regarding work, the house, an additional business we did as a family, and of course, the child. Due to the lifestyle dictated by the 21st century, we had less and less time for what was the most important to us – Iris. Because of that, and because of all other obligations, there was stress, tension, dissatisfaction… We believed that we were good parents, but it felt like something was missing.

And then something was discovered by my other half when she asked me if I saw the announcement for the “Support, NOT Perfection” workshop on the website of our child’s kindergarten.   The plan was for both of us to attend the seminar, but because of her job, that was impossible, so the decision was easy – Daddy will go!

In the beginning, I had a strange feeling, because I was the only dad in the group, along with moms and couples. It was even stranger to talk about something so intimate as parenting, with strangers I didn’t know.

I admit I overcame that feeling very quickly! It was an unbelievable feeling to come to workshops, I couldn’t wait for the next one, the group was great, and the facilitator was the best. The topic of the seminars was very familiar to all of us and often painful. We would go through topics that interest all parents, received guidance, and advice from other participants. Mom could hardly wait for me to come home, tell her everything, to do homework together. We bonded better and stronger, learned a lot together, and applied a lot in practice.

Kovacica is the first town in Serbia who got its Parenting Center on September 30, 2021. The workshops will take place there once the epidemiological situation grants it.

The program has a healing property on the parents’ psyche because you learn that we are all troubled by the same problems and that there are no perfect parents, and that should not be our goal either.

The main objective should be to be good people, to be a better person in the evening than the one who woke up that morning.

The Novak Djokovic Foundation gave my family and me the opportunity to do just that!

The post “Daddy will go…” – Personal Story of Ivan Barca, Participant of our “Support, NOT perfection” Workshops appeared first on Novak Djokovic Foundation.

Since last weekend, it’s been all about number 7! Within our “Support, NOT perfection” program (SNP), we opened another Parenting Center in “Pcelica“ (Little Bee) preschool in Sremska Mitrovica. Centers represent a unique project that is being implemented in Serbia for the very first time and it emerged with the aim to further empower the SNP participants in order to take better care of their children. The funds have been secured through The Human Safety Net’s “Scale Up Impact“ – an innovative multi-year strategy for amplifying the social impact for the most vulnerable families and aspiring entrepreneurs.  

With the project having commenced in September, the cities that have gotten their Centers are: Kovacica, Pancevo, Sabac, Bac, Jagodina, Sremska Mitrovica, Uzice. During 2021 and 2022, a total of 15 Centers will be opened.  

“The opening of this new Parenting Center in Sremska Mitrovica is a great indicator of the importance we place on parenting in our SNP workshops. We at the NDF, together with our long-term partners, are rather pleased because the education, support, and experience that parents and caregivers take from our workshops will play a crucial role in the development of their children. As always, the partners and we will keep overseeing the whole process, while making sure that all our Centers are are recognized by a friendly atmosphere, top-notch conditions, and the impact they will have on families’ lives,” said Maja Kremic, NDF National Director.

The back four any team would be proud of: Natasa Djurdjevic and Dragan Filipovic in the middle, with Smiljana Grujic and Maja Kremic (NDF) providing threat out wide.

Support, warmth, sincerity, directness, and mutual respect are the values by which parents are at the workshops are led. By discussing different topics such as discipline, unacceptable behavior, and emotion management, they are strengthening their capacities in order to develop a more constructive and stimulating relationship with their children. Today, we are happy for extending our mission to Sremska Mitrovica!” – added Smiljana Grujic, NDF Head of programs.

This Parenting Center in Sremska Mitrovica, like all others, will be characterized by support, warmth, sincerity, directness, and mutual respect.

“The year highlighted by uncertainty and the continuation of the pandemic has only strengthened our friendship with the Novak Djokovic Foundation, as well as our mutual values and the ever-growing wish to help others. Hence plenty of humanitarian activity, among which a significant place is occupied by the Parenting Centers in 15 cities in Serbia. I am glad that we will thus enable parents and caregivers to seek professional advice, acquire new skills, and exchange experiences””all of which will contribute to their being better at this most challenging role,” retorted Dragan Filipovic, President of the Executive Board and CEO of Generali Insurance Serbia.  

Little Bees buzzing to the tunes of an accordion, followed by a round of applause.

“The opening of this Parenting Center is just a continuation of a successful collaboration with the Novak Djokovic Foundation and their partners, that successfully started with the implementation of the “Support, NOT perfection” program in 2019. I am thrilled because we furnished this space together, where workshops will be taking place,” concluded Biljana Cvijetic, director of “Pcelica”, a.k.a. The Queen Bee of The Little Bee.  

By the end of 2023, the “Support, NOT perfection” program will have encompassed an additional 2800 and almost 5600 children, in close collaboration with government institutions and local authorities.  

The post Another Parenting Center Opened in Sremska Mitrovica appeared first on Novak Djokovic Foundation.

Since last weekend, it’s been all about number 7! Within our “Support, NOT perfection” program (SNP), we opened another Parenting Center in “Pcelica“ (Little Bee) preschool in Sremska Mitrovica. Centers represent a unique project that is being implemented in Serbia for the very first time and it emerged with the aim to further empower the SNP participants in order to take better care of their children. The funds have been secured through The Human Safety Net’s “Scale Up Impact“ – an innovative multi-year strategy for amplifying the social impact for the most vulnerable families and aspiring entrepreneurs.  

With the project having commenced in September, the cities that have gotten their Centers are: Kovacica, Pancevo, Sabac, Bac, Jagodina, Sremska Mitrovica, Uzice. During 2021 and 2022, a total of 15 Centers will be opened.  

“The opening of this new Parenting Center in Sremska Mitrovica is a great indicator of the importance we place on parenting in our SNP workshops. We at the NDF, together with our long-term partners, are rather pleased because the education, support, and experience that parents and caregivers take from our workshops will play a crucial role in the development of their children. As always, the partners and we will keep overseeing the whole process, while making sure that all our Centers are are recognized by a friendly atmosphere, top-notch conditions, and the impact they will have on families’ lives,” said Maja Kremic, NDF National Director.

The back four any team would be proud of: Natasa Djurdjevic and Dragan Filipovic in the middle, with Smiljana Grujic and Maja Kremic (NDF) providing threat out wide.

Support, warmth, sincerity, directness, and mutual respect are the values by which parents are at the workshops are led. By discussing different topics such as discipline, unacceptable behavior, and emotion management, they are strengthening their capacities in order to develop a more constructive and stimulating relationship with their children. Today, we are happy for extending our mission to Sremska Mitrovica!” – added Smiljana Grujic, NDF Head of programs.

This Parenting Center in Sremska Mitrovica, like all others, will be characterized by support, warmth, sincerity, directness, and mutual respect.

“The year highlighted by uncertainty and the continuation of the pandemic has only strengthened our friendship with the Novak Djokovic Foundation, as well as our mutual values and the ever-growing wish to help others. Hence plenty of humanitarian activity, among which a significant place is occupied by the Parenting Centers in 15 cities in Serbia. I am glad that we will thus enable parents and caregivers to seek professional advice, acquire new skills, and exchange experiences””all of which will contribute to their being better at this most challenging role,” retorted Dragan Filipovic, President of the Executive Board and CEO of Generali Insurance Serbia.  

Little Bees buzzing to the tunes of an accordion, followed by a round of applause.

“The opening of this Parenting Center is just a continuation of a successful collaboration with the Novak Djokovic Foundation and their partners, that successfully started with the implementation of the “Support, NOT perfection” program in 2019. I am thrilled because we furnished this space together, where workshops will be taking place,” concluded Biljana Cvijetic, director of “Pcelica”, a.k.a. The Queen Bee of The Little Bee.  

By the end of 2023, the “Support, NOT perfection” program will have encompassed an additional 2800 and almost 5600 children, in close collaboration with government institutions and local authorities.  

The post Another Parenting Center Opened in Sremska Mitrovica appeared first on Novak Djokovic Foundation.

As we eagerly anticipate the opening of new Centers for Parents, where workshops will be organized for parents and caregivers all over Serbia, with the help of our partners, Generali Osiguranje Serbia and The Human Safety Net, we will be sharing with you a string of heartfelt stories, the first one being of mom Ljiljana (‘Lily’ in English) Babic from Pancevo. The stories are in their original form, written with a pure heart and tons of love.

My husband and I have known each other for a long time, more than 23 years. We know each other so well, by touch and look, we are best friends. Everything between us was easy, fun, unforgettable, exciting, lofty, and carefree: education, career, travel, socialization, everything was perfect. We were very diligent and hard-working and we were accomplishing our visions and goals without particular difficulties. After that we got married and wanted to become parents: to multiply our love, to become a family.

Divorce was a common topic in my family, and my wish was for no one to get divorced, to never get divorced myself, and I chose my partner carefully.

Boom! “You cannot get pregnant naturally, the only option is in vitro fertilization.” I was the problem. After that came a heroic fight, with a sense of guilt, unsuccessful attempts, wondering whether it was meant to be that way and whether this battle with hope, hormones, highs and lows even made any sense. However, at the same time, I had a burning desire and a crazy drive to become a mother.

After the fourth attempt, I was pregnant. Celebration, joy, calling everyone, telling everyone. What would we name them? Her or him? What will their room look like? Where will they go to school? I will have a family, it will be my family, only mine, and I will not let anyone else have it! And then – boom! The world which had never existed in reality, only in my mind, came crashing. The fetus was not developing. I was falling, I could barely hold on, I was drowning in tears of unaccomplished expectations. We moved on, I held my head high, returned to the new normal. Let’s try again! And again. I was pregnant! This time I was quiet, isolated, hidden from everyone. No expectations, plans. I wait for the heartbeats, I wait for the double test, I wait for the genetic analysis, I wait for the 5th month. We have a healthy boy! I wait for the 6th month – the cerclage was not good, I waited for the seventh month, the placenta was too matured, I wait for the 8th month – I could barely walk, I could not walk at all – I was crawling, everything hurts. I’m protecting it, holding on to it, just a little more, just to grow a little more. And then comes the 9th month. I don’t know what will come after pregnancy, we only handle the logistics and what needs to be done. I don’t want to build a world that doesn’t exist. Not yet.

He was born big, beautiful, loud, a 10/10 boy! And then a new world was created, that I consciously didn’t want to know, a world that had an entirely new dimension. Where was I in that world? Was that me? Where is the milk, where is my body, whose breasts are my these, who is my husband? Who was born: the mother or the child? The dad was reborn. It is not the man I knew before! I don’t know anything, I don’t understand, I’m not doing well, I didn’t prepare enough and it frightens me. Now I will be responsible for this creature until the end of my life. I am panicking, aaaaa! And so it was day after day, month after month, first year, second year, now almost third. Some parts of me have returned, some have shrunk, but I am not the same person and I will never be again. And where were the two of us, who loved each other endlessly all these years, and then encouraged each other and fought together, what is our shared role and how to reach ourselves again? Where to find answers to all these questions?

One of the key takes that Ljiljana learned while attending the “Support, NOT perfection” workshops: There is no more important role in life than raising a child because children are the ones who make us real people.

As nothing in life happens by accident, at that time I thought and felt the need for advice and support with parenting, and I saw the invitation for the “Support, NOT Perfection” workshop of the Novak Djokovic Foundation. We learned about this parenting program, and we thought that this was a great initiative and that it suited our needs. Our main goal was to check if we, as parents, were on a good path, and how to find our own shared path.

During the workshop, I noticed that my son was one lucky child, that we were already using the majority of the methods, and I was proud. The exchange of experiences with other parents was precious because it allowed me to see that some things that worried us a lot were completely normal, and a part of everyday life of all parents. What was particularly helpful to me were the discussions that led me to understand how my husband and I could have more time for ourselves, without feeling guilty. As well as to understand that I have a tendency to overdo things that I did not have as a child because I come from a dysfunctional family. I grew up with my mother as my father did not want me to be born. My mother divorced my stepfather, who was like a father to me and whom I adored. And my father later divorced my stepmother. Divorce was a common topic in my family, and my wish was for no one to get divorced, to never get divorced myself, and I chose my partner carefully.

Every workshop was like therapy to me, I experienced the examples very emotionally and personally, I found it hard to swallow, I would hold back tears, but yet I had the need to share my experiences with the group, to be a living example of how some things should not be done, and how they should be understood better. I found myself in the role of a child again, I would squat and get down to see the world my child, my son sees, the one that all our children see, but that I could now see as well. Because that child was always me, with the need to be someone’s child, with both parents, where they would see me, pay attention to me, love me, and respect that I came from them. How hard is it actually when you are a child, a small yet big person in a tiny body, with a clearly developed conscience and a great need to be accepted and understood, but still incapable of expressing yourself “in the right way” as the society expects it?

Thanks to facilitator Aleksandra and the whole Support, NOT perfection team for the wonderful instructions and advice on how to raise healthy, happy, and successful people!

Suddenly I realized that, in the workshops, I had the role of a child, not a parent. I resolved some of my internal conflicts and secured the foundations to raise my child in a healthy way, with no doubts whether I’m doing the right thing. Images and experiences from my childhood had an impact on creating the person I am today. Childhood is the key starting point for creating an individual, with all their personality traits. Our children are already formed people, in terms of emotions, sense of justice, love, and attention. It is up to us to direct them in the right way. The two of us, as the base, are the starting point of the existence of our family. We are the foundation, the basis and we have to protect sanctuary, everything depends on us.

Thanks to facilitator Aleksandra and the team for the wonderful instructions and advice on how to raise healthy, happy, and successful people! The advice that I liked the most was to hug and kiss our children as much as possible while we can, while they are little. Good luck, dear parents and caretakers! There is no more important role in life than raising a child because children are the ones who make us real people.

With the desire to support all individuals who influence the early development of the child, the Novak Djokovic Foundation has been implementing the “Support, NOT perfection” program since 2017, which brings together parents and caregivers who understand each other well because they have similar daily challenges. Within 10 workshops led by trained facilitators, participants address topics related to raising children under the age of 6, exchange experiences, enrich their knowledge of parenting and develop a mutual support network. In cooperation with our partners, Generali Osiguranje Serbia and The Human Safety Net, the Foundation will expand the impact of the “Support, not Perfection” program to another 2,200 parents and almost 4,400 children throughout Serbia in the next three years by opening Centers for Parents in 15 different cities. 

The post Let’s Hug and Kiss our Children as Much as We Can While We Can, While They are so Teensy-weensy! appeared first on Novak Djokovic Foundation.

As we eagerly anticipate the opening of new Centers for Parents, where workshops will be organized for parents and caregivers all over Serbia, with the help of our partners, Generali Osiguranje Serbia and The Human Safety Net, we will be sharing with you a string of heartfelt stories, the first one being of mom Ljiljana (‘Lily’ in English) Babic from Pancevo. The stories are in their original form, written with a pure heart and tons of love.

My husband and I have known each other for a long time, more than 23 years. We know each other so well, by touch and look, we are best friends. Everything between us was easy, fun, unforgettable, exciting, lofty, and carefree: education, career, travel, socialization, everything was perfect. We were very diligent and hard-working and we were accomplishing our visions and goals without particular difficulties. After that we got married and wanted to become parents: to multiply our love, to become a family.

Divorce was a common topic in my family, and my wish was for no one to get divorced, to never get divorced myself, and I chose my partner carefully.

Boom! “You cannot get pregnant naturally, the only option is in vitro fertilization.” I was the problem. After that came a heroic fight, with a sense of guilt, unsuccessful attempts, wondering whether it was meant to be that way and whether this battle with hope, hormones, highs and lows even made any sense. However, at the same time, I had a burning desire and a crazy drive to become a mother.

After the fourth attempt, I was pregnant. Celebration, joy, calling everyone, telling everyone. What would we name them? Her or him? What will their room look like? Where will they go to school? I will have a family, it will be my family, only mine, and I will not let anyone else have it! And then – boom! The world which had never existed in reality, only in my mind, came crashing. The fetus was not developing. I was falling, I could barely hold on, I was drowning in tears of unaccomplished expectations. We moved on, I held my head high, returned to the new normal. Let’s try again! And again. I was pregnant! This time I was quiet, isolated, hidden from everyone. No expectations, plans. I wait for the heartbeats, I wait for the double test, I wait for the genetic analysis, I wait for the 5th month. We have a healthy boy! I wait for the 6th month – the cerclage was not good, I waited for the seventh month, the placenta was too matured, I wait for the 8th month – I could barely walk, I could not walk at all – I was crawling, everything hurts. I’m protecting it, holding on to it, just a little more, just to grow a little more. And then comes the 9th month. I don’t know what will come after pregnancy, we only handle the logistics and what needs to be done. I don’t want to build a world that doesn’t exist. Not yet.

He was born big, beautiful, loud, a 10/10 boy! And then a new world was created, that I consciously didn’t want to know, a world that had an entirely new dimension. Where was I in that world? Was that me? Where is the milk, where is my body, whose breasts are my these, who is my husband? Who was born: the mother or the child? The dad was reborn. It is not the man I knew before! I don’t know anything, I don’t understand, I’m not doing well, I didn’t prepare enough and it frightens me. Now I will be responsible for this creature until the end of my life. I am panicking, aaaaa! And so it was day after day, month after month, first year, second year, now almost third. Some parts of me have returned, some have shrunk, but I am not the same person and I will never be again. And where were the two of us, who loved each other endlessly all these years, and then encouraged each other and fought together, what is our shared role and how to reach ourselves again? Where to find answers to all these questions?

One of the key takes that Ljiljana learned while attending the “Support, NOT perfection” workshops: There is no more important role in life than raising a child because children are the ones who make us real people.

As nothing in life happens by accident, at that time I thought and felt the need for advice and support with parenting, and I saw the invitation for the “Support, NOT Perfection” workshop of the Novak Djokovic Foundation. We learned about this parenting program, and we thought that this was a great initiative and that it suited our needs. Our main goal was to check if we, as parents, were on a good path, and how to find our own shared path.

During the workshop, I noticed that my son was one lucky child, that we were already using the majority of the methods, and I was proud. The exchange of experiences with other parents was precious because it allowed me to see that some things that worried us a lot were completely normal, and a part of everyday life of all parents. What was particularly helpful to me were the discussions that led me to understand how my husband and I could have more time for ourselves, without feeling guilty. As well as to understand that I have a tendency to overdo things that I did not have as a child because I come from a dysfunctional family. I grew up with my mother as my father did not want me to be born. My mother divorced my stepfather, who was like a father to me and whom I adored. And my father later divorced my stepmother. Divorce was a common topic in my family, and my wish was for no one to get divorced, to never get divorced myself, and I chose my partner carefully.

Every workshop was like therapy to me, I experienced the examples very emotionally and personally, I found it hard to swallow, I would hold back tears, but yet I had the need to share my experiences with the group, to be a living example of how some things should not be done, and how they should be understood better. I found myself in the role of a child again, I would squat and get down to see the world my child, my son sees, the one that all our children see, but that I could now see as well. Because that child was always me, with the need to be someone’s child, with both parents, where they would see me, pay attention to me, love me, and respect that I came from them. How hard is it actually when you are a child, a small yet big person in a tiny body, with a clearly developed conscience and a great need to be accepted and understood, but still incapable of expressing yourself “in the right way” as the society expects it?

Thanks to facilitator Aleksandra and the whole Support, NOT perfection team for the wonderful instructions and advice on how to raise healthy, happy, and successful people!

Suddenly I realized that, in the workshops, I had the role of a child, not a parent. I resolved some of my internal conflicts and secured the foundations to raise my child in a healthy way, with no doubts whether I’m doing the right thing. Images and experiences from my childhood had an impact on creating the person I am today. Childhood is the key starting point for creating an individual, with all their personality traits. Our children are already formed people, in terms of emotions, sense of justice, love, and attention. It is up to us to direct them in the right way. The two of us, as the base, are the starting point of the existence of our family. We are the foundation, the basis and we have to protect sanctuary, everything depends on us.

Thanks to facilitator Aleksandra and the team for the wonderful instructions and advice on how to raise healthy, happy, and successful people! The advice that I liked the most was to hug and kiss our children as much as possible while we can, while they are little. Good luck, dear parents and caretakers! There is no more important role in life than raising a child because children are the ones who make us real people.

With the desire to support all individuals who influence the early development of the child, the Novak Djokovic Foundation has been implementing the “Support, NOT perfection” program since 2017, which brings together parents and caregivers who understand each other well because they have similar daily challenges. Within 10 workshops led by trained facilitators, participants address topics related to raising children under the age of 6, exchange experiences, enrich their knowledge of parenting and develop a mutual support network. In cooperation with our partners, Generali Osiguranje Serbia and The Human Safety Net, the Foundation will expand the impact of the “Support, not Perfection” program to another 2,200 parents and almost 4,400 children throughout Serbia in the next three years by opening Centers for Parents in 15 different cities. 

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